My mom is determined...that may be where I get it. She's competitive with herself (and possibly during bridal shower games), and driven. In a nutshell, she stuck to a training schedule and did a phenomenal job during the race. She kept running long after many others would have stopped. She ran for a larger percentage of the race than she thought she could, and finished well below her goal time. I was proud to run next to her as her daughter.
It's not about distance or speed, people. It's about challenging yourself and working your butt off to get there. Then, and this is where part of the challenge lies for some of us: Allow yourself to be PROUD of what you have accomplished. No "thanks, but..." My mom spends much of her life looking out for others, and very little time looking out for herself. I am so proud of her for what she accomplished - and what she continues to accomplish as she keeps up with running - but nothing could have made me happier than hearing the words, "You know? I actually am proud of myself." Music to my ears.
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My mom has taught me a lot of things, but at this point in my life -- being right in the depths of motherhood -- I can confidently say that the most valuable lesson she has taught me is to show my kids unconditional love.I am not a perfect mother, and some days are better than others. I go through periods of feeling like I've got this, and like I am a great mom. I also go through ruts, where I'm cranky with my kids and forget to enjoy the moments buried in the challenge and exhaustion of it all.
The other day, after I said "I love you" to both of the girls, Kaitlyn says, "You know, you don't have to say that all the time, Mom. We know you always love us."
You always love us. We know.
I'm doing something right. Thank you, Mom, for teaching me by example to love my precious girls unconditionally. To never make them feel like they are unlovable (even when they are drawing princess scenes in purple pen on the yellow walls or throwing an unlovely tantrum in the middle of Freddies). Thank you for teaching me to let my children make mistakes without being afraid that they won't be forgiven. Thank you for somehow teaching me to parent in a way where they know I love them through the cranky days and the raised voice moments.
I have never, for a second, doubted that you and Dad love me no matter what. If I'm going to pass anything on to my kids, let it be that. Kids who know they are loved and supported without conditions, grow up to be compassionate adults. That, is what I want for my girls.
Happy Mother's Day:
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More of the same around here: Gardening (Grandma Bonnie got the girls these awesome watering cans), swimming on Tuesdays and Thursdays, running, working, and raising chicks. Oh yeah, we got chickens.
Tornado Collins:
K's school pic. Did I mention she recently turned 13?
Hula hoop madness:
We went to the feed store to just look at the chicks. You know, see what they had and whatnot.
When we went to just look at Cavalier puppies, we came home with Riley. This is how we roll.
Maisy is a Barred Rock, and we recently have suspicions that "she" may be a rooster. She's is currently dwarfing her sisters. I have no idea if that is any indication, and I hear that we won't know for sure until about five months, but I'm crossing my fingers that we have ourselves three hens.
Wendy is a Light Brahma (white) and Buffy is a Buff Orpington.
So far, they are easy. I'm going to go ahead and enjoy this part. Aside from eating A LOT and needing a change of bedding every couple of days, they just hang out, cheep, and sleep. They stay in the garage with a heat lamp, and should be ready for an outdoor coop in a few weeks when they have all of their feathers.
Kaitlyn: "I know you must miss your mom, but it will be okay. I think I'll have to be your mama for now."
Okay, I'll shovel rancid poop for that.
We took them out into the yard for the first time this evening since it was warm enough:
Little stinkers peck at my pink toes...
Austen and I are continuing to enjoy our one-on-one time while K is at school. We are down to the last few weeks of the school year.
The girls started swimming lessons again after Hawaii. They got a boy teacher this time, which usually poses a problem for Kaitlyn but after a few classes she was good to go. And, she finally showed Teacher Chris last night what she can really do in the water after holding back for two weeks, so we are hoping she'll move up for the next session. If not, oh well.
Austen and I had a play date with Baby Ellis last week. I went to high school with Ellis' mom, Anna, and we've recently reconnected through Facebook (point for social media!). It's amazing what you find you have in common with people after you've had a chance to grow up. I'm thankful for that.
Austen gave Ellis every single one of her toys like it was her job:
Speaking of reconnecting, Riley had to get shots last week and he and I had a car ride reminiscent of his puppyhood. Poor guy.
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In marathon news, tomorrow morning is my last long run before tapering. By the way, last weekend's run was great! No pain, so I'm crossing my fingers that it continues that way. I'm thinking that my body just needs a break, so tapering comes at a perfect time. I've been running at least 15 miles once a week for over two months. It makes sense that my legs will be thanking me after this weekend.
Remember the whole "allow yourself to be proud" thing? I'm allowing myself to be proud of the fact that I ran over 150 miles in the month of May.
Three months ago, I didn't know I was capable of this. Think about that.
1 comment:
You continue to inspire. Lovely tribute to your mama, as well. Looking forward to watching you bloom as an urban farmer. Hens rock!
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